It started with a statement of possibility — I am the possibility of being courageously, outrageously self expressed — that I created in the Landmark Forum 17 years ago.
Ultimately I just wanted to free myself. Because for too long I had been caught behind the screen of other people’s projections on me.
When my healing crises caused me to finally realize I had hidden everything that was true, creative, unique and ME, I had no choice but to start to re-discover what I loved, what moved me, what I desired, what I was good at without trying to perform in to someone else’s ideal of success.
And an amazing thing happened — my life totally transformed.
First, though, it got to the point where my body was showing me that my life force was being drained.
One of my legs literally lost sensation and I couldn’t walk on it for months. I had been dealing with the loss of full use of one of my arms for years. I had inflammation and pain throughout my body. I was sick a lot. And I was miserable.
I couldn’t keep letting myself lose my ability to dance, to be athletic (after being a 4-sport athlete and a trained dancer for many years). I couldn’t allow my creativity to fade into oblivion. I couldn’t allow my relationships to become the toxic sludge my parents’ had been. I had to wake up.
Then I made a decision — that decision was that I was going to follow my joy no matter what.
I didn’t know where to start exactly. Except I knew what it felt like. And I tried a lot of stuff until I felt it. That brought me to music and DJing because on the stage I felt it like never before.
I had no idea what transformation and healing my body would undergo when I came out of hiding, told the truth about who I was, and began to unlock my authentic voice.
Inner transformation of the kind that heals body ailments and imbalances comes from alignment within and without.
So often we build false temples and then struggle to hold them up. What if the key was to build your temple based on your truth, not someone else’s?
It’s not an easy thing to do in this society. We are bombarded with ideas that aren’t ours and we soak them in like a sponge until they start to seem like ours. We assume other people’s belief systems. We study people and try to become them.
This is why so many of us our sick and depressed. We are suffocating inside of the shell of someone else that is not feeding us our essential nutrient of freedom.
Ostensibly we have freedom in our society but we don’t feel free. And we don’t exercise that freedom in all the ways we could.
For a long time there was an epidemic of women who were hiding their truth…until recently. #Metoo showed us that our truth is bursting out from behind the dam.
We are in a new era where truth is the alchemical element required for the transformation of the societal structures that create subjugation.
So let us become the agents of awakening that awaken in ourselves first and become the luminaries leading the way with our fiery truth.